Reliving past

 3 years. It has been almost three years since I last saw her. I still remember the day when we both were standing against each other in the...

 3 years.

It has been almost three years since I last saw her.

I still remember the day when we both were standing against each other in the court. We were in the court for divorce hearing.

Divorce! 

I had never thought in my entire life that it I would be getting divorced. Specially not after knowing about my child.

My child

My baby

My baby girl

My daughter

My princess

My first ever child.

People around me have literally started making jokes about me being so much attached with someone who is not even born. It might be because I was the first one in my group to get married and becoming a father. Since, no one in my friend circle was a parent that's why they might have not understood my emotions. Or maybe  i was over excited. But even today, I still feel the same. 

I still wish that she would be here, in my life. Even if I have to bear Tanya at all cost, I would have enjoyed it for the sake of my daughter. 

                There was no chance for us to be together the moment when Tanya thought of me separating from my daughter. She didn't even stop here. She tried her best to cover up her deeds. She damaged others life just to hide her wrongdoings. 

      I knew that she was selfish and self centred but I never had an idea that she could be this much reckless. 

I regret the day I met her.

I regret the moment I touched her.

I regret the time when I decided to marry her.

But what I don't regret is my child.

Even though so much has happened but I still wish my child to be alive.

               I stood up as I saw her coming. She was wearing red kurta and white salwar. Stole around her neck is  mixture of white and red. She looks more chubby now. She must have gained weight. Her hair are short than the last time I saw her. 

She saw me and stopped for few seconds. We both were staring at each other. It didn't feel good but it felt new as if I was meeting her for the first time.

She was something different. 

She was not looking like old Tanya.

Something has changed in her.

She she took her steps towards me again. To my surprise, she was smiling. and what surprised me more that her smile was not wicked. It was a genuine smile. Which is surely very unexpected from her. 

"I never expected that you would ever come to meet me." She said coming close to me but still six feet away.

"I am surprised that you are still expecting things from me." I taunted.

"Are you here to taunt me?" She asked with a smile.

"No, I was just passing from here. So I thought that why not to meet you!" I chuckled dryly.

She laughed.

"I can see that your sense of humour has gotten better in these three years." She complimented.

I just nodded my head.

"Have a seat." She asked me to sit.

"Dada, get us tea and a coffee  that too without sugar." She asked her servant to bring the stuff.

"No, I have stopped having coffee. Now I am all ok with tea." I said.

Surprise was clearly visible on her face. She turned her face towards the servant and he nodded signalling that he understood. He went to kitchen.

"I am surprised, how has that miracle happened? You remember, there was a time when you need to have coffee 5 times a day. I can't believe that you have left it." Tanya said.

"Of course, I remember. I remember everything. You are right that it's a miracle. It is Karishma only who has made these changes possible." I said proudly.

She narrowed her eyes in confusion.

"My wife, Karishma. She has made me leave all my bad habits." Her smile vanished as soon as I mentioned my wife.

her face was telling me that this is not what she had expected me to say. It wasn't like she looked hurt or like she felt bad but it seems to be an expected for her. She composed herself within seconds and got back to her normal smile

"Oh yes, I heard that you got married. Congratulations"she congratulated me.

I smiled.

She looked at me constantly for few seconds. Meanwhile, I was just wondering that what should I say now. 

"You seem to be very happy." She she said getting my attention.

"Of course I am. She is amazing." A natural smile appeared on my face.

"Good to hear that you got a wife like you always wanted." She said.

"Frankly speaking, I had never thought about wife. Not even before you. Not even after you. It is just Karishma who has made me  aware of my own self. It is just because of her that I am able to explore that side of mine which I could have never believed existed." I told her the truth.

I want her to know the truth.

She averted her eyes away.

"Won't you ask that why am I here?" I asked her suspiciously because this was the first thing I was expecting her to ask me. 

Honestly, I was not expecting this much polite treatment from her. The Tanya I knew would never agree to even see my face but she is sitting right in front of me and having a chit chat.

That's a surprise.

She looked at me  back.

"You are my guest. You have come to my home to meet me. It would be very rude of me if I ask that why have you come here. I am just performing manners of a good host. But if there is something for me to know then go ahead and tell me." She said casually.

"Good to know that you have learnt to be less rude certain times. I hope that you hand worked on your other skills well." I said.

She laughed a bit.

"I was right. You are here to taunt." She said controlling her laughter.

"Why would I come here just to taunt you? And that too after so many years? don't you think your assumption about me being here is a bit vague?" I asked settling my elbows on my knees to get a bit down to make this conversation a bit serious.

"Then let's keep it simple, short and quick." She sad resting her head on her knuckles.

I kept a pink file on table in front of her which I brought with myself. She looked at the file and then at me. 

"What is this?" 

"Why don't you see it yourself?" 

She slowly took file in her hand and opened it. She was looking into  it intensely. She was folding papers very carefully as if she was consuming whatever was written in them. What she is doing right now actually shocked me. I didn't expect her to be this much easy about this topic. 

       Suddenly, she stopped turning the pages and looked at me with her stiff eyes.

"Why I are you showing this to me now?" She asked clenching her jaw.

"Actually, I made one another file also. It was blue one. I had kept the details almost same in both the files but still I made few changes according to the gender because at that time I didn't know that it was going to be a girl." I said having a very weak smile on my face.

She just looked at me but didn't say anything.

"You know Tanya, this is the file I made during your second month of pregnancy. I know that it's insane but I couldn't wait to plan my baby's future. I couldn't wait to think about that in which hospital it will be born, in which Play school would get admitted, about her school, about her toys" I realised pooling water in my eyes. "You know, I didn't think that I would never let the date till the age of 25. Forget boyfriend, she would have directly a husband which will be chosen by me." I laughing shedding tears. 

I stopped and composed myself.

"This is why we are not together?" She whispered.

"What do you mean?" 

"If I knew about your real nature then I would have never gotten close to you." She said keeping the file on table.

"If I knew that you would get this much emotional,I would have never told you about the pregnancy and would have gotten rid of that fetus on the very same day I got to know about it." She said clenching her jaw again.

Honestly speaking, her words were piercing my heart. But today I am determined to not to lose my calm.

I smiled. "That's a surprise to me. I thought that Tanya never indulges herself in something she doesn't know about." I said.

"You thought right. But as always, you are an exception. You were an exception when we first met. You were an exception when we got close. You were an exception when we were together all the time. Shockingly, you were an exception even when I told you about my pregnancy. And your exceptional traits have made me do the things I never thought I would ever do in my life" 

"What do you mean by this?"

"I thought that you were like any other normal 21 year old guy. I thought that you would want to get rid of the child as soon as you will get to know about it but you you wanted to win best fathers award. I was shocked to see that how could you get ready to take its full responsibility even when you were not financially stable. You didn't even take the responsibility but you meant it." Har words surprised me. 

On one hand she says that it I was different and on another she does the things to hurt me and my loved ones.

"I even married you for the sake of this unborn baby." I said.

"Exactly" she said in anger.

"What was wrong in that? Didn't I suppose to marry you after knowing about your pregnancy?" I asked in surprise because she is really not making sense to me at all.

"It was not wrong to get married. It was very wrong to get married because of the child." She said. "You never loved me. You never did. You were not even intended to marry me. You never took me seriously when it came to relationship status. You were all dedicated towards your career. But it took 360 degree turn as soon as you get to know about your so-called child."

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